The month of March is coming to a freezing end. Spring gave Chicago a huge FU finger. It teased with a warm day or two, then struck back with cold weather. March also brought us some questionable moments. Things that make inquiring minds go, hmmm.
The latest was the smack heard and seen around the world. Last night, Will Smith slapped Chris Rock in the face at the Oscars over a joke about Smith’s wife’s “GI Jane” look. Imagine what would happen if Chris Rock made a joke about Alec Baldwin’s wife, Hilarious, Hilarity, or whatever her name is. Baldwin, known for his mean temper, and punching innocent people may have pummeled Rock until pulled off by several people. Or, or there may have been some kind of deadly accident. The “unloaded” gun Baldwin did not know he was carrying went off by itself, an accidental discharge. Hmmm?
Russia is destroying parts of Ukraine while the Ukraine armed forces and militias are killing Russian soldiers. Farmers are towing away abandoned Russian tanks. A Russian tanker ran over an officer with a tank. France’s President, Emmanuel Macron, is trying to pretend he is a diplomat and peacemaker. His vocabulary consists of one word, de-escalation. When he is not mugging for the cameras deescalating, he takes inventory of his nation’s WWII arms, brand new, never fired, and only dropped once. Hmmm?
While waging unprovoked war crimes in Ukraine, Russia condemned Azerbaijan for sending troops into the Armenian-held territory of Nagorno-Karabakh, killing three Armenian soldiers, and wounding others. There were supposed to be Russian “peacekeeping” forces to, well, keep the peace. Little good they did. Putin made his displeasure known about the unprovoked attack. Vlad the Invader is now trying to be Putin the Peacemaker. I guess Putin can juggle two personalities at once. Hmmm?
I listened to parts of the hearings to confirm Ketanji Brown for Supreme Court Justice. I was somewhat amused at the fascination some senators had over child pornography. Ted Cruz, the Cuban-Canadian with the creepy, ugly beard, would not let go. He is still seeking more information on child pornography. One could wonder about Cruz’s and others’ deep-diving fascination with child pornography. Hmmm?
The Chicago Public School system reported 8% of their tech items missing. Thousands of computers, iPads, and even air purifiers, lawn equipment, treadmills, and defibrillators. They reported the missing inventory to the police, who believe many items were stolen or on loan items were not returned. CPS must have some poor protocols for tracking their inventory. The smash and grabbers have nothing on CPS personnel or people they allow access to their property. One could wonder where all that property went? Your tax dollars, especially those high property taxes at work and waste, Hmmm?
And, last, but not least, our “illustrious” mayor, Lori Lightfoot, had her own hmmms this month. First, she claimed to have the biggest male genital member in the city, causing Chicago males to question their own manhood, so to speak. Then, she attended a St. Patrick’s Day parade wearing a kilt. Evidently, according to my Irish friends, she was not wearing it properly. One questioned how she kept the biggest genital member in Chicago from revealing itself. Was she wearing Tighty-Whities underneath to keep said member constrained? Hmmm?
We live in the realm of you just cannot make this stuff up. We will see what April Fool’s Day brings us in a few days. Hmmm?