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What is acceptable

Image: PV Bella

In this new era, we went from political correctness to being woke- whatever that means. It is tough to express oneself without being criticized or getting in trouble in this day and age. Daily, expressions are being considered verboten.

I usually refer to elected officials as clowns. The other day, the news reported that a showman’s organization stated that referring to politicians as clowns is insulting to clowns.

Some time ago, I wrote that politics was nothing more than a great parlor game, a great magic act. I was not alone in that thinking. You guessed it. The magicians considered it an insult to be compared to politicians.

Occasionally, I would refer to someone I did not like as a dog during conversations. My late dog, Jack, reminded me that the reference was insulting to dogs. I stopped using the term in his presence to spare his feelings.

One of my favorite sayings is that person is dumber than a box of rocks. Yep, I was reminded that rocks are inanimate objects. The reference is insulting to geology.

Image: PV Bella

The same holds true for referring to people as rats, horses’ asses, or pigeons as flying rats. It is insulting to rats, horses, and pigeons.

The current state of the City of Chicago is anarchy. It is anarchy when prosecutors and judges keep putting violent criminals back on the street. Is this insulting to anarchists?

This brings me to football. I refer to football players as wusses. Ever since the game changed to protect the celebrity- the quarterback- the game turned into a kinder, gentler sport. The celebrities would not survive playing against the likes of Dick Butkus or Alex Karas. By the way, football is not a team sport. The only player who matters is the quarterback. The rest are just lumps of brainless muscle doing his bidding or trying to stop him in the kindest, most gentle manner.

If you need further proof of the wussification of football, look no further than the Super Bowl. Several years ago, the league determined that the big game could only be played in warm weather areas or domed stadiums. The poor future champion wusses should not be exposed to snow, hard frozen ground, or cold and even sub-zero temperatures. Yeah, the Super Bowl sucks as much as the game of football.

I am sure that someone will proclaim that comparing football players to wusses is insulting to wusses.

Hockey players are true athletes and way more brutal than football players. It is a blood sport, as some blood will be shed during the games. The players suck it up. If they lose teeth, they swallow them to use as fuel for more energy, unlike the wussified football players. My apologies to wusses.

Baseball is a much better sport. If soccer is “the beautiful game,” baseball should be considered elegant. Baseball is consistent. Most of the rule changes over the centuries were to improve the sport. Some of the rules remained the same since the game’s inception.

I will tell you what I find insulting. The two evil political parties’ mascots. Unlike the ignoble politicians who spew their manure, the donkey and the elephant are noble beasts. The mascots should be changed out of respect for the noble beasts and to reflect reality. The copperhead snake and the rattlesnake would better represent the two parties. Like the parties, they are venomous. My apologies to copperheads and rattlesnakes.

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