Author: pvbella

“This is the day we pay homage to all those who didn’t come home. This is not Veterans Day, it’s not a celebration, it is a day of solemn contemplation over the cost of freedom.” (Tamara Bolton)

Memorial Day is the day we remember and honor those who died serving our country. It is a day of remembrance, not celebration. Happy Memorial Day is an oxymoron for morons. For too many, it is a day of mourning.

Memorial Day, originally Decoration Day, was established to commemorate those who perished during the Civil War. When America entered World War I, the name was changed to Memorial Day, and the purpose was to honor members of the military who died in all wars.

For most people, Memorial Day weekend is just another three-day party. People stock up on food and liquor to celebrate. It is three days of party hearty. With a keen eye for saving, some shop the Memorial Day “sales,” stocking up on more useless crap. The dead are forgotten.

Memorial Day was never meant as a day of celebration, another three-day drunken maw stuffing weekend away from your toils. It was set aside as a day of commemoration. The day was set aside to remember that what we cherish most has a high cost. Whether it was defending our freedoms or defending the freedoms of others, our sons, daughters, husbands, wives, brothers, and sisters paid the ultimate price.

Count all the crosses and count all the tears
These are the losses and sad souvenirs;
This devastation once was a nation
So fall the dice, how high is the price
There in the distancе a flag I can see
Scorched and in ribbons but whose can it be;
How еnds the story, whose is the glory
                                     Ask if we dare our comrades out there who sleep (A Soldiers Story/Ennio Morricone)

In our celebrations, we forget the cost of war. Death is the cost of war. Catastrophic injuries are the cost of war. Those who served in wars know this. We glorify past wars as righteous. Yet, those who served know the grim truth.

1,300,700 (+/-) members of the American military personnel perished in the War of Revolution through the Wars in Afghanistan and Iraq (Statista). The Civil War was the deadliest from which Memorial Day originated (Decoration Day).

I am sick and tired of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation. War is hell.” (General William Tecumseh Sherman)

Former President, Barack Obama surprised volunteers at Alexandria National Cemetery when he showed up unannounced to place American flags on the graves of 4000 of those who made the ultimate sacrifice for their nation. The cemetery was established in 1862 and holds the graves of Union soldiers from the Civil War through all other wars.

“One of the greatest honors of my life was the privilege of serving as commander-in-chief, and with pride also came sometimes heartbreak and loss,” he told attendees ahead of the morning event. “And the sober recognition of the sacrifices that so many Americans and their families have made to preserve our freedom. As we go out here, I hope that we just reflect and say a prayer for and say thanks for those who came before us. And for those of you who are still serving those of you who may be serving in the future, thanks to you as well.” (Marine Corps Times)

Former president and candidate for president Donald Trump did not participate in any Memorial Day activities to honor those who made the ultimate sacrifice. Why you may ask? He considers those who died for their country as “losers and suckers” His exact words.

Before you throw those brats on the grill, stuff your pie hole with nachos, guzzle beer, or load your vehicle with “sale” items, you should take a minute to remember the reason for this holiday. Remember the fallen. Commemorate the men and women who made the ultimate sacrifice. Silently thank them.

As an aside, Chicago’s Memorial Day Parade dates back to 1870.

“I hate to say this but there are more people who get shot every weekend in Chicago than there are schools in Texas,” Abbott said. “And we need to realize that people who think that well, maybe we can just implement tougher gun laws, it’s gonna solve it. Chicago and L.A. and New York disprove that thesis… “If you’re looking for a real solution, Chicago teaches that what you’re talking about, is not a real solution. Our job is to come up with real solutions that we can implement.” (Texas Governor, Greg Abbot)

“Look at Chicago,” McLaughlin said. “You can’t even buy a gun in the city of Chicago, but they have shootings every weekend.” (Uvalde mayor, Don McLaughlin)

Illinois Gubernatorial, Candidate, State Sen. Darren Bailey of downstate Xenia called Chicago “a crime-ridden, corrupt, dysfunctional hellhole” when asked about gun violence… “Let’s just call it what it is,” said Bailey, who once co-sponsored legislation to split Chicago from the rest of the state. “And no one knows that better than the friends and the people that live in Chicago. Something’s wrong. City leaders, they hate the police.”

Where is actor Will Smith when we need him? There should be a WS beacon, so Will Smith can swoop in and slap some of these politicians, telling them to keep “Chicago” out of their pie holes.

By the way, some of the problems driving crime in Chicago are caused by an incompetent Superintendent of Police, David Brown. Brown is from Abbot’s state, Texas. Maybe Texans are the problem and not the solution.

We can expect ignorant statements from Governor Greg Abbot. He is one of the Politicians of Walmart (POWs).

Darren Bailey from downstate Xenia should be added to the list of POWs. In Bailey’s case, Gubernatorial should be changed to Goobernatorial. By the way, what “friends” does Bailey have in Chicago?

In 2019, Darren Bailey and other downstate politicians sponsored a resolution to separate Chicago from Illinois, making the city its own state. He stated that … “the majority of residents in downstate Illinois disagree with City of Chicago residents on key issues such as gun ownership, abortion, immigration, and other policy issues.” (Chicago Sun-Times)

Um, that is the way it is supposed to be. Chicago is a large cosmopolitan urban area. We do think differently than the downstate rural areas. Different regions have different communal cultures.

 Bailey is running for governor of Illinois. One would think he would have a handle on the issues affecting the whole state, not just his tiny corner of it. It is evident he is a less-on (Lower than a moron). He knows nothing about urban issues or governing anyplace larger than his tiny patch of the state.

Darren Bailey is a member of the alphabet people, the KNC, Know-Noting Community. That is why Goobernatorial candidate is an apt description.

Bailey does not even know Illinois political math. If you want to win statewide office, you need to win Cook County/Chicago, the richest, to use an agricultural term Bailey would understand, crop of voters in Illinois. You do not win votes by insulting populations.

No matter what we think about Chicago’s and Cook County’s entrenched issues, Bailey has no clue. He knows nothing about urban affairs or issues. He knows nothing about anything. His campaign website reads like he is running for the village idiot rather than the highest office in the state.

The Chicago metro area is the economic engine of Illinois. Chicago is a world-class city with world-class attractions for tourists and businesses. Xenia, where Bailey lives, is a postage stamp size bucolic village in Clay County.

How is Darren Bailey going to campaign in Chicago? Does he believe he will receive a warm welcome here? Does he think that people in Chicago will embrace him and his Know-Nothing agenda? Does he believe insulting our city will make us all warm and fuzzy towards him?

Bailey, you insulted our city with your Know-Nothing ignorance. You do not deserve respect or even acknowledgment of your existence by the people of Chicago. We do not want you in our city. You have no “friends” here.

You should stay downstate, where you belong. Maybe you should run for dog poop scooper in Clay County, a position you are eminently qualified for and can win. Governor is way beyond your intellectual pay grade.

This is my city. I criticize and can criticize it all I want. I will not tolerate Know-Nothing less-on Texas cowpokes or downstate farmers bashing Chicago. None of us should.

Will Smith, we need you.

“This is a gun-crime crisis,” Brown told reporters who pressed him on his strategy going into the summer, typically the most violent time in the city.” We are awash in guns.”

“…young people have been “fussing and fighting since the beginning of time,” and the only difference now is that too many of them are settling their differences with a gun.” (Mayor Lori Lightfoot/Sun-Times)

I just can’t do it anymore. I listened to part of Chicago Superintendent of Police David “Tex” Brown’s presser about the mass shooting at Chicago and State Street Thursday night. I could not take the nonsense and lies of the mumbling, stumbling, bumbling, and rambling. I cannot listen to or read about Mayor Lori Lightfoot anymore. She is another babbler of nonsense.

Lightfoot and Brown do not inspire confidence. They do not have a handle on the rampant violence in Chicago. Brown has an excuse, his incompetence. Lightfoot has no excuse as she should have fired Brown long ago. Lightfoot is the mayor. She wears the hat. She cannot escape the blame, accountability, or responsibility. She is not even good at ducking them.

“We were already supposed to have fixed posts in place at Chicago & State. So, huh?” the alderperson tweeted. “City Council needs to step in & demand accountability. Their strategy is failing us miserably.” (Ald. Brendan Reilly/Sun-Times/Emphasis mine)

The alderman is only partially correct. All “Tex” Brown’s plans, strategies, and deployments are miserable failures. He is a miserable failure. He was a miserable failure from day one. The only public safety policy, plan, strategy, and deployment in Chicago is that failure is an option, the only option.

New York City has had three mass shootings so far this year, and Los Angeles has had two, but Chicago –despite a smaller population than both of those cities – has already had 10... …Overall during the last three years, Chicago has gone from 33 mass shootings in 2019, to 53 in 2020, to 60 in 2021. (CBS Chicago)

Lightfoot and Brown ran out of excuses. There is no plan, strategy, or anything else on public safety. No number of pressers or hype by the news media can demonstrate that Brown is competent and knowledgeable. He is just another hack mercenary police executive from someplace else cashing in on the big kachingo$.

Lightfoot’s rollback of the city curfew is a cheap publicity stunt. Teens do not care about curfews. Young people will do what they want, when they want, and where they want. There are not enough police officers to enforce such a ridiculous stunt.

Brown lost control of the city. The news media is mute on his incompetence. Lori Lightfoot lost control of the city. The news media rarely, if ever, criticizes her. The Chicago news media should be forced to file in-kind donations with the Illinois Board of Elections for all the free publicity they give City Hall.

I was a police officer for almost 30 years. I worked in some of the most dangerous and violent areas in Chicago. I never saw it this bad. Chicago is almost a dystopian city. The violence is out of control in every neighborhood. Innocent people are being wounded and killed. More teens and even tweens are arming themselves. No one is safe in Chicago. Every citizen in this city is a potential innocent victim of violence.

The criminal element has no fear of repercussions by the criminal justice system. The system is irreparably broken. It was broken intentionally by our elected officials, Chicago Machine Boss, Toni Preckwinkle, and her mini-me minion, State’s Attorney Kim Foxx. Their so-called criminal justice reform is an abject failure. Worse, they refuse to acknowledge their policy failures. They, too, have blood on their hands. Politicians never admit they are wrong. When policies fail, they double and triple down instead of reversing course.

How many murders must be committed before the people of Chicago say enough is enough? How many more lies by elected officials and their PR weasels in the news media must people believe before Chicagoans demand better? When are the people going to say enough is enough?

Since the elected officials and Police Superintendent refuse to reverse course and crackdown, it is up to us. I said it before and will keep saying it. We need to hold the elected official’s feet to the fire. We need to make a big noise. We need to put ice-cold fear in their hearts- if they have one- that their jobs are in peril.

The problem is not “gun violence.” There is no such thing. Guns are inanimate objects. “Gun violence” is a made-up term to excuse the real problem- human beings. The correct term is human violence. “Gun violence” is a lie, the big lie.

The problem is not guns, drugs, gangs, and COVID. The problem is people- teens, tweens, and adults, who do not believe the laws apply to them. People who know there will be no repercussions for their crimes. The problem is elected officials and appointees who enable them through flawed policy decisions favoring criminality over public safety.

There should be a hue and cry for Mayor Lightfoot to fire the stumbling, mumbling, bumbling, rambling cowpoke from Texas. Send him back there on his high horse. He should be replaced with someone who knows this city and the neighborhoods. Someone who will appoint staff with the same knowledge. Someone who cares about the city more than just the big bucks.

Lightfoot, Brown, Preckwinkle, Foxx, and their PR allies in the news media think the public is dumb enough to believe all the lies they tell, justifying their failures. If people do not demand better, they will prove that deadly quartet right.

“As a Millennial, I have lived through three economic recessions, a terrorist attack that killed over three thousand Americans, two overseas wars that were started when I was still in grade school, a global pandemic that our Boomer-run government was completely unprepared to deal with, three of the four presidential impeachment trials ever held in American history, and an attempted overthrow of the government in defiance of an election result.

Meanwhile, the generation before mine came of age during one of the most prosperous economic booms of the postwar era (and wouldn’t shut up about how depressed and aimless they felt during that time), and the generation before them grew up under material comforts unimaginable to kings and emperors fifty years prior.” (Robert H./Comment on Facebook)

You would think these Millennial mamalukes and Gen Z mooks would come up with something original. Instead, like our hyperventilating news media, they copy and paste whatever bullshit they come across on social media. I saw the above quote more times than I want to remember.

Mr. H. is one of the people I would like to punch in the throat several times. He and his band of 21 to late 30-somethings have no idea what they are talking about when they criticize the Baby Boom Generation and the generation before. They make shit up to fit their imaginary current situation. Someone must be blamed for their angst and anxiety.

Mr. H.’s generation does not think. They feel. They are pissed off because their feelings override what little intelligence they possess.

Mr. H. was the beneficiary of living with “material comforts unimaginable to kings and emperors.” He grew up in prosperity, and now, like the Boomers he despises, he will not shut up about how “aimless and depressed” he is.

Why does this bratzilla hate his Boomer parents and grandparents? What horrors did they inflict on him to spout such bullshit? His parents must be devastated how their crotch beachball turned out.

As a Boomer, I can attest that Mr. H. is as full of shit as a Christmas goose. Our grandparents and parents did not grow up “…under material comforts unimaginable to kings and emperors fifty years prior.” On the contrary, our grandparents worked hard to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table. They survived WWI, a worldwide pandemic, the Great Depression, and WWII through hard work and ingenuity. They did not complain about the past over and over again.

Many Boomers fought and died in Viet Nam and the current perpetual wars waged since 2001. Mr. H. did not fight in those wars that started when he was a child. So how the fuck did he suffer? How did he suffer a terrorist attack as a child? Was he in the Twin Towers?

We did not see whatever prosperity Mr. H. is dreaming about. Our parents worked in blue-collar jobs to provide for their families. They navigated strikes and lay-offs with no pay. There were recessions. Somehow the bills got paid. Mr. H. confuses comfort with prosperity. We, like he and his parents, lived comfortable lives. Most of our families did not see the wealth that prosperity brings.

We did not have all the glitzy toys Mr. H. and future generations have stacked up in basements, garages, and storage lockers. Our parents worked hard for what they earned, earned being the operative word.

Many of us went to work as early as twelve years old. We did every kind of job imaginable to earn some money. There were no handouts. People like Mr. H. expect to have the whole world handed to them on a silver platter. They were devastated when internships were not given to them.

Oh, the horror and suffering Mr. H. went through. Terrorist attacks, wars, and the global pandemic. Was he raised living on the streets of war-torn Simpsonistan? Did he navigate mortar rounds, IEDs, and snipers while walking to and from school uphill both ways? Was he dodging capture, torture, or catching COVID while foraging for food on the way home?

Add to that the impeachments and attempted overthrow of the American government. They damaged Mr. H.’s already fragile psyche, especially since many, if not most, of the chromosomal mutants who stormed the Capitol were millennials, just like him. His pain must be unending.

These spoiled bratzillas constantly complain about the Boomer generation ruining their lives. All is woe is me, poor me, me, me. They create total horseshit to excuse their laziness, lack of job skills, and general lack of knowing how things work and navigating life. Schools do not teach those skills. Mr. H., his generation, and cohorts in Gen Z demand change, yet they cannot change a lightbulb.

The sad thing is too many supposedly educated, and intelligent people believe this horseshit. I know many older millennials. They are well-rounded individuals. They have life and work skills. They did not “suffer” all the horrors Mr. H. claims. They did what responsible adults do, improvise, adapt, and overcome. They did not let their feelings override their intelligence.

Robert H. is responsible for his travails. Not the Boomers, not the government, terrorists, or combat military personnel. He is. If he wants to wallow in self-pity, he can. No one is to blame but him. He can keep his bullshit to himself.

A word of avuncular advice to these whiny little puss heads. Cowboy the fuck up. Start acting like an adult instead of a bitchy teenager who needs a hard slap in the face and a solid kick in the ass.

There have been mass gatherings in various downtown places on weekend nights. The Bean in Millennium Park is an attraction for the large groups of young people having a night on the town. Unfortunately, these gatherings erupt in violence.

There is only one thing to do. According to the new Chicago Way, if a public art piece is controversial and may lead to violent acts, it should be removed to a secret location known only to the Great Comedian.

To prevent violence and protect police officers, the Bean should be removed and stashed out of sight and mind. Problem solved.

The same holds true for certain businesses that are a magnet for masses of young people where violence breaks out. The McDonald’s on Chicago and State is one. It is next to a CTA El station, making it easy for young people to get there. Last night there was a mass shooting there, leaving 2 dead and 8 wounded. The restaurant should be immediately closed by the city and demolished. It could be turned into a pigeon sanctuary or the city’s first cat park.

If there are more problems at North Avenue Beach or any other beaches, they should all be shut down. The city could create the Chicago Shoreline Protection Agency to preserve and bring the Lake Michigan shore back to its natural state- as close as possible. It should be designated an environmentally endangered and protected area. Humans will not be allowed access.

If the Picasso in Daley Plaza becomes a magnet for the masses and violence breaks out, it too should be removed. Shuttered off to the city’s Never-Never land of public art.

These measures are the same theory behind the removal of public art. If something causes so much offense or anger that violence erupts, it should be removed or closed off to the public. It is for the common good. Lives will be saved. Citizens, police officers, and fire personnel will not be injured. Innocent members of the public will not be potential victims of violence.

Those were the reasons for the removal or potential removal of statues of famous people. Anger, offense, and violence, or the potential of violence, caused the city to rethink its commemorative public art. The same reasoning can and should be used for the mass gatherings where violence erupts.

It is more than obvious that something about the objects or places incites people to anger and violence. There is no human problem here. The objects or areas are the problems. The solution, get rid of or repurpose them.

In the interest of public safety, Mayor Lightfoot should act immediately and start removing or shutting down these dangerous objects or places. The mantra of “Guns, Drugs, Gangs, and COVID” as the drivers of violence should include public art and other sites that drive violence. The city cannot blame and control humans or stop the flow of illegal firearms. It is common sense to control access to areas or remove objects driving the violence. A simple solution to a simple problem.

“It’s like my soul left my body,” said Chanell Holliday during a visit with classmates of her son. He was fatally shot on Saturday near The Bean.  …Chanell Holliday has barely slept since her 16-year-old son Seandell was shot to death in Millennium Park on Saturday, ripping her world apart and sending the city of Chicago into a tailspin. (WBEZ)

It is every parent’s nightmare—the death of a child. The membership in a club no one wants to join, and no one is welcomed. Chanell Holliday is the newest member of that club. Her 16-year-old son, Sandell, was murdered at Millennium Park over the weekend. He was shot and killed by another teen.

Seandell Holliday is now a nameless, faceless victim. He is just another piece of a data set to be analyzed by the research pornographers and experts with no expertise. The hormonal teenagers in the news media will use the data porn to prove something or other positive about crime, hyping for City Hall. A City Hall that needs all the hype it can get.

We saw this before. We will keep seeing this—children, from infants to teens, being murdered. Parents are living their worst nightmares. And a cold-hearted city doing little to stem the rampant violence plaguing every neighborhood.

“Because this is hard. This is so hard for me.” (Chanell Holliday/WBEZ)

The words of a mother in mourning.  How many more children will be murdered in Chicago before City Hall wakes from its wet dream of a “Summer of Joy?” When will elected officials in this city rise from their somnolence and realize there will be no joy in Chicago this summer? There will only be more mourning and grief. More nightmares.

2022 will be another Summer of Murder. A Summer of Grief and Mourning. A City Hall that is asleep at the wheel.

When will the people of this city of silence start making noise? A noise so loud it is heard around the world. There is only one thing politicians care about. Only one thing that will force them to do something. A big noise. A noise so loud it puts fear into their merciless, pitiless, cold hearts. A sonic boom noise that makes them quake in fear of losing their six-figure jobs with Rolls Royce perks and benefits.

As long as the public is silent, elected officials will do nothing. Oh, they will talk. Talk is cheap, like the cheap suit politicians. The lies must stop. The cover-ups must stop. City Hall has been covering up for Chicago Police Superintendent David “Tex” Brown’s total incompetence since day one.

No matter what we think about past mayors, not one of them would tolerate this constant citywide violence. They all would have done something, including holding the Chicago Police leadership accountable. Heads would roll and keep rolling until the surges in violence were curbed and mitigated.

Mayor Lori Lightfoot ran on a platform of transparency and accountability. She rules through secrecy with zero accountability. No one is held responsible, including her. No one knows what she is doing.

All Lightfoot has left is the news media which keeps throwing her life rings. Ring after ring, excuse after excuse, lie after lie. When those fail, they quote the experts with no expertise to keep their narrative alive. 

Summer begins on June 21^st. If you citizens do not rise up now and demand better, there will be no Summer of Joy. There will only be a summer of death.

I do not know who is worse, the f**ktard fribbles at TimeOut Chicago or the birds**t brains at Chicago Magazine. If someone gave them copies of the Kama Sutra, they would pull out crayons and color in the images. Whenever I read their advice, I want to commit seppuku with a broken jagged-edged beer bottle.

Chicago Magazine’s latest advice column is a new low in absolute idiocy. The title of this pile of horse sh**t? “Don’t be a FIP! Five unmistakable signs you’re not actually from Michigan” FIP meaning F**cking Illinois People. All the adjoining states label Illinoisans as FIPs. We label others as F**king Cheese heads, F**king Hoosiers, etc.

This piece of what my dog used to leave behind advises what people from Chicago should not do while visiting Southwestern Michigan. It is inane and asinine. First, SW Michigan has been an exurb of Chicago for several decades. Many Chicagoans have vacation homes or moved there. Some commute daily by train to the city to work. It is part and parcel of what is known as Chicagoland.

Second, no one goes to Michigan to pretend to be from there. People go on vacation for one reason, R&R- rest and recreation. They want to have fun. They do not go to blend in with the locals or pretend to be something other than they are. Michiganders only care about one thing. How much dinero are you going to leave there?

What are Chicago Magazine’s ways of identifying FIPS?

Driving a foreign car: No one in Michigan cares what make of cars tourists drive.  They can tell who you are by the license plates. Michiganders drive foreign cars, trucks, and farm equipment. It is evident the author of this nonsense, Edward McClelland, never visited Michigan or any place else. He should get out of mommy and daddy’s basement once in a while.

Owning a beach house: Many of the beach houses in SW Michigan are owned by people from Illinois, especially Chicago. Why does owning a beach home imply you are pretending to be from Michigan? Maybe McClelland should put the bong down or lay off the magic mushrooms.

Wearing a Stray Dog T-shirt: The Stray Bar sells souvenir T-shirts. They are meant to be worn. They do not imply anything except that you visited the bar and bought a T-shirt. Just like people come here and purchase souvenir T-shirts- TO F**KING WEAR THEM.

Jogging on the beach at sunset: According to this less-on (Lower than a moron), outdoor pursuits in Michigan are only hunting and fishing. Talk about overly precious privileged toxic stereotyping. Oh, and of course, he, like his lowlife ilk, had to get in a dig about billionaires. “Penny Pritzker and her husband trained for the Chicago Marathon at their Harbor Country getaway.”

Mispronouncing Michigan locales: This base snipe product of bonobos does not know that people will constantly mispronounce the names of places. Hell, most people in Chicago do not know the proper pronunciation of Goethe Street or other places.

If this was intended as a humor piece, it fails. Aside from its pretentious stereotyping, there are too many people in Chicago dumb enough to take this tripe seriously. Need proof? Look who they vote for and keep voting for.

Anyone who believes anything these two comic rags write should be institutionalized and placed on psychotropic drugs until cured. The writers of these two magazines continually make up stuff knowing the rubes and bark chewers in Chicago will believe it. They know that people who read these publications are way dumber than they are.

Do you feel it, Chicago? Spring sprung late and is turning into summer. Do you feel it? Do you feel the joy? Does Mayor Lightfoot’s proclamation of the Summer of Joy envelope you in joy?

A person is shot every 3 minutes in Chicago. Oh, joy. Joy to the World! The weather will usher in another summer of rampant violence. It is already beginning. Large gatherings at Millennium Park and spilling into the Loop created violent outbursts and shootings. Two people were killed downtown over the weekend.

Lightfoot proclaimed a curfew. People under 18 years of age will not be allowed in the park after 6 PM Thursday through Sunday unless accompanied by an adult. Chicago Police Superintendent David “Tex” Brown proclaimed his usual mumbling word soup and salad. Yeah, I can feel the joy. Oh boy, joy. This mayor and police superintendent know nothing about teenagers. You cannot tell them, especially organized groups, that they cannot do something. Guess what? They are going to do it.

“Incensed by the “senseless upcharge” at Starbucks for nondairy milk, “Succession” and “Babe” actor James Cromwell and other members of PETA, where he serves as an honorary director, staged a protest Tuesday at a Midtown Manhattan location of the coffee chain.” (Washington Post)

We have a new group of whiners and crybabies demanding equity. The vegan community is upset that nut-based milk costs more in their specialized drinks at Starbucks than dairy-based, a “senseless upcharge.” They demand milk equity. Paying more for nut-based milk is a violation of something or other. It is the new civil rights issue. The alphabet community, PETA, is behind the move.

Nut-based milk costs more to produce than dairy. Starbucks pays more for the product, so the consumer pays more. That is how economics works. There are always smug ignorant people who think they should receive special treatment. Are they going to demand stores drop the prices for nut-based milk to accommodate them? These are over-privileged precious people. If they can afford to buy anything at Starbucks, they can well afford to pay a little extra for their oh-so-special milk.

I am demanding equity. I do not drink coffee because I like it. I need it. My therapist, Dr. O. Reo, prescribed I drink coffee throughout the day to control my violent tendencies. Coffee prevents me from becoming a serial killer of the pestiferous members of the human species who make my daily life miserable. My health insurance should pay for my coffee. I demand free coffee. I do not have an alphabet community like PETA to support me in my quest for caffeine equity.

 I have an idea to reduce wounds and murders from Chicago’s violence. The city should procure and issue free bulletproof vests to all citizens who request one. The city could purchase the vests with donations from citizens, especially wealthy citizens. Corporations should donate, too, as this initiative will positively impact their employees. Since the city cannot or will not control and mitigate the violence, the least it can do is give the citizens some chance of survival.